Extra Credit When Failing a Test = Failing the Test

Dictionary.com defines “expect” as…
1. to look forward to; regard as likely to happen; anticipate the occurrence or the coming of.
2. to look for with reason or justification.
3. to anticipate.
When I was younger, my mother would make sure I clearly understood the importance of following directions.


One morning on the way to school, she dropped me off at the bus stop and said, “I want that nasty room cleaned before I get home from work”.
“Ok”, I responded, as I smiled, kissed her on the cheek, and boarded the bus. 
Upon her arrival home after work, she walked in, gave me a hug and kiss, then promptly made her way to my bedroom, where she expected my room to be clean, based on our earlier conversation. 
After less than a minute of inspection, she returned to where I was and asked, “Nathan, Why didn’t you clean your room, like I asked?”
I responded in the most loving yet disobedient way, “Mom, I didn’t clean my room, but did you see the living room? I cleaned that perfectly”.


In her usual, lovingly instructional way she said, “Son, What I want you to do, is what I asked. If you would just do what I’ve asked, you would never have to do extra. Extra doesn’t mean much if what I requested wasn’t done. “
Wow.
She taught me a very valuable lesson with her string of statements. In relationships, it is very easy to use my same response with our mates. It’s easy to be very selfish even though we know the following.
1. We know what to do for our mate.
2. We know what our mate likes.
3. We know how our mate likes it done.
Yet, we still take the lazy approach by doing things for our mate the way WE want to do them and then say the most ironic thing when asked, “Why you don’t do the things I like the way want them done…”
“I love him/her my way!”
The problem with that statement is all 5 words of it, lol!
Love is very, internally judged. We all have a personalized view of what LOVE means to us. For some it may mean money, diamonds, flashy vacations, and great night life activities. For others it may be romantic evenings, a great sex life, dates every now and then, and a roof over their head. Others may even feel like love is, commitment, friendship, long talks at night, and helping with anything they may need help with.


You are the ONLY one that can define what love means to you. Once you figure that out and can articulate it to others, you are well on your way to developing this important word called a “standards”. When standards aren’t met it will then be easy to evaluate.
Lastly, let’s not forget the big 3 lettered monster…”SEX”


This is another area that humans love to do THEIR way and care or not care if the receiver has a mutually good sexual experience.
The best way to avoid those awkward sexual experiences and “faked” moments is to wipe your sexual slate clean with your new interest and treat them just like you would a class in school that you are interested in. You pay attention and learn them inside and out in order to please them the way THEY want to be pleased.
The more you travel the same route, you also learn how to get there faster and when road blocks arise you can find other ways to still please!
I have learned in my 31 years of life that if you just follow directions you rarely get lost on the way to your destination!


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5 comments

  1. ******snapping,snapping,snapping,snapping, snapping*****. Feel like I am at Def Poetry Jam. LOL

    On a more serious note, my status the other day hit on this. “if you only love me the way that YOU want; but never in the way that I NEED; show me the point….

    Selfishness should be taken out back and shot when it comes to love. being selfish when it comes to loving your mate is the same as being selfish with your son or daughter. It makes for an extremely volatile relationship.

    I get why people say that “love/relationships are hard”. supposedly the stereotype is that anything that you really want in life is something you are going to work hard to achieve. I disagree. People make relationships difficult. How? I can use several differnt words and/or phrases to explain why: BAGGAGE, JEALOUSY, INSECURITY, ANGER, NONEXISTENT SELF CONFIDENCE; SELFISHNESS, MISREPRESENTATION, DISHONESTY, LACK OF TRUST, INABILITY TO COMMUNICATE, UNWILLINGNESS TO COMPROMISE, etc…..etc…..etc.

    WE MAKE RELATIONSHIPS DIFFICULT WITH ALL OF THE BULLSHIT THAT WE BRING INTO THEM! If we would just leave all of the stupid shit at the curb; we could see how much better our relationship can be.

    A friend said something to me once about being able to read minds. I told him; “I don’t read minds; I just pay attention. PAY A FUCKING TTENTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Even to the details that you feel are insignificant. What is small to you could be the grandest gesture in the world to another.

    One last thing and I will remove the soapbox from beneath my feet:::

    All individuals have a breaking point. Especially when it comes to being unhappy in love. This breaking point is called an “I am not getting what I want at home, so I will find it somewhere else” point. So, take a look at your situation and make certain that your mate is not one of those. Why? because there are hundreds of thousands of folk just like myself. One’s who are still searching for that Mr. or Mrs. “perfect for me” who would gladly pick up the ball that you so willingly dropped.

    Hate it or love it; this is what it is. MY TRUTH.

    THE END……

  2. Yeah but you also have to remember that sometimes you have to veer off the path. You both have to be open to new experiences. Learning the ins and outs is great, but being able to teach a lesson can be an even greater moment for the both of you. Honestly how many of us have kept on the road, sometimes you have to get off and check out the road stops. If you don’t like what you find you can always get back on the road.

  3. @Anonymous:: I hear you on being open to new experiences. But, when veering off track, you gotta keep something in mind. You may go your own way; stop during the trip to check out the sights. but, when you get back on that road, it may not be in the same car you started with…..hopefully, that makes perfect sense.

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